Why vulnerability aka the DEEP SHIT is scary

Feb 24, 2022 | Vulnerability

*Based on my Lived Experience Learnings*

If you know me, you know that I love a good deep chat right? So grab ya scuba gear legend because we’re going DEEP on this one..

You name it, I’ve gone inward and I’ve gone outward to resolve anxiety. I’ve checked all the cupboards, probably the same ones you have and yeah I’ve found some hidden nuggets on the way but nothing like the narnia I’m about to share with you, this is some lion, witch and the wardrobe shit right here.

Over some NEXT LEVEL DEEP work, I broke up with anxiety, I got tired of the relationship we had.

It was messy and fucking lonely.

It was when I discovered the magic of vulnerability.

You know when your palms sweat, your heart pounds, shame, judgement and ALL the emotions?

I know the feels too well, that’s vulnerability, that’s your deep shit right there.

Yep! It’s bloody scary, and remember I’m not here to fart fairy dust and cover you in fluffy rainbows.

The good news is,

You can discover it too.

This uncomfortable part of us, when pushed to vulnerability, teaches us about ourselves. When you have anxiety, you don’t fear the outcome, you fear how you will handle the outcome. Vulnerability teaches you how to handle it. You create connections with others. The kind of connection that makes you feel alive.

When vulnerability is flexed, it shows up what you like about yourself and what you don’t like about yourself, yep that bit can be confronting. People get to meet the real authentic you…that’s right, YOU!

And what’s even more beautiful is that this vulnerability gives other people permission to do the same, to go deeper.

 So, how low can you go baby?

I want to dive into why the deep vulnerability shit is scary. We’re all on a unique journey and the beauty is that we’re all here to teach and inspire each other, and that is my goal as I write this blog, to share my lived experience and what I was scared of. Please take it with a grain of salt or take it with your whole heart. Not everyone is ready to go deep, I respect you on this. I just want to show you what you too can access because bow chicka wow wow it is HOT!

I was scared of not having anxiety…

Mic drop!

Yeah I didn’t see that coming either. I didn’t realise this at the time because anxiety was all I knew, I was in my way and after all, we were in a relationship together. In fact anxiety was like another limb, a really really shit one, and looking back at myself, my behaviours and why I was the way I was, anxiety was my fall back every time, it was my false safety.

That’s what anxiety is, a false sense of safety.

So I’d be on stage (not really up on stage, I just mean with my mic and shit) and I’d tell myself this story, yeah “oh Lou, you’ve got anxiety, so it’s okay that you’re a fucking psycho”. That’s just a snippet of the shit I would tell myself. If you’re thinking “omg that’s totally me” because you tell yourself similar stories,
let me grab the gin and tonic.

So what stories are you telling yourself?

Get real about that

Let me be a little more blunt.

What excuses are you telling yourself?

Because that’s what happens, sometimes we don’t even know we’re doing it. When you have anxiety you don’t want to feel scared because that makes you feel worse and
it’s already bad, right?

I understand, I think a lot of us feel this way. We’re scared.
We don’t want to go into the murky waters of ourselves but hear me out ok?

I was scared shitless that if I didn’t tell myself this story that I would find things out about myself that I didn’t like that would leave me feeling worse.

I was scared shitless of what would come up, what I would need to deal with and then end up in a panic attack. I feared the confrontation and what I would need to change.

That’s the thing about Anxiety, it doesn’t like change and that was me, haha I guess that’s why we broke up in the end.

So here’s some reminders for you to pop in your back pocket..

Vulnerability is bloody scary, you’re going to fuck up,
so be kind to yourself.

Anxiety and vulnerability both have something in common.

They are both HARD.

Remember the difference between them though.

One keeps you going in circles and one helps you grow.

When you choose to go deep you find magic, sounds cosmic, but trust me, you actually do.

Ok I’m ready, but now what?

That’s why I’m here.

The first step is to reach out (dip your toe into vulnerability) and for you to do just that shows your courage, my heart explodes every time.

Send me a DM, share with me what’s going on @the.anxietyproject My DMS are always open.

Book in for a free 15 minute call, we can have a quick chat.
I can give you some starting tips.

Join the waitlist for my mastermind, which I’m starting in April, we’ll be going through the exact steps it takes to get deep and feel that magic. From a lived-experience approach. I am your walking proof – along with my past masterminders